Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Hack Job

Yesterday was pretty hectic. I awoke at 4:45am which gave me just 30 minutes to throw on some clothes and make a mad sprint for the train station (photo: I have become more feminine in recent months). Just as I threw myself into the train car the conductor belted out the battle cry of locomotion into the cold morning air "Alllll Aaaaboaaaaaaard!". It was really quite beautiful ...such a strong baritone voice. I quickly found a window seat on the left side of the train and set to work on creating a comfortable place to continue my slumber until we arrived at Union Station ....and then I was struck with that panicked sinking feeling when you realize you have forgotten a crucial item ...damn it! I forgot my bike lock key! Why the hell did I take it home in the first place?! And Ikon O. Klasst is even going to join me for part of my ride home tonight!

After taking an inventory of my options I came up with two possible solutions. Observe exhibit A & B below (photos: taken from random websites)









The Bic pen trick proved fruitless and so I moved on to plan B ....the hack saw. This is how I met Howard. He came down from maintenance hack saw in hand. Turns out it's a lot easier to cut through the straight bar than the actual U part of the lock. Together Howard and I took turns gnawing through the plastic casing and finally into the metal rod core. It took some trying, but finally we freed my bike from it's generic Kryptonite shackles. I might never see Howard again ...but for a brief moment we were a team and together we accomplished something great (photo of actual lock).

3 comments:

rantinray said...

Ha, more feminine? Does that mean your cosmetic bag normally only contains the Chamois Butt'r?

Anna said...

In a nutshell.

Anonymous said...

http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/macgruber-jonah-hill/229853/

You should've just called Macgruber.